Collateral Sage

The Minions have managed to locate a group of Seekers who have or need other Sources of Wisdom, and will be so referred. http://www.slate.com/id/2265082/

1. The first Seeker in need of other Wisdom is a young man with a tiny child, whose wife began to strike him during and argument, and who struck the woman back. He is duly remorseful, but this cannot continue.

The Sage is concerned that this is not an appropriate question for "entertainment only" Advisors. This needs to be dealt with promptly through a professional. With a child now in the the household, tensions will only get higher. Either of you could have called the police during the incident, which could ahve meant both of you in jail and your child in foster care. Concentrate on anger management and marriage counselling. You each could learn something, or many things. For instance, she need to find a way to express herself without losing her temper, and you need to learn to listen to what she is saying rather than defending yourself. While you do not perceive yourself as distant, she has another definition, which you will not learn either by her screaming nor by your "listing ways" that she is wrong. Ask yourselves, is this the marriage you want to model for your child, that your child might one day incorporate as an "ideal" marriage?

2. The next Seeker is a student who believes she has Asperger's Syndrome.

The Sage must find new Minions. These are not entertainment-value concerns. Speak to your school counselor. That is why schools have them, to assist the students in finding their own right path to adulthood.

3. Our only Seeker truly needing the Sage's advice is one who sent cards to newly widowed aunts rather than miss a planned vacation.

The Sage is relieved to see you. It is absolutely so much more important for your children to meet Mickey or for you to turn beet red at the beach than it is to attend the funerals of your uncles. After all, the uncles are dead and will not miss you. The funeral is for them, not for the surviving aunts or cousins. They need to get past this minor setback in their lives and understand that your vacation plans are paramount.

4. Our final Seeker has found a Guru to follow, but resists the new status as Minion.

The Sage commends this gentleman on locating his own Minions and for fully comprehending the meaning of the word, "temporary". You absolutely must not disturb the natural order. By no means may you tell this gentleman that you are unable to continue to provide your services. Certainly his recruiting you as a Minion far outweighs whatever it is the company hired you to do. Even when your temporary assignment end, you must do whatever it takes to continue in your responsibilities to your Overseer, even if you must drive across town with his slices of bread. Also, should anyone suggest such silliness as a grocery which delivers, shield this man from their interference.